Cream Dream

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Spoon Cream Dream: Orange Wooder Ice and Whipped Cream

Unwanted

The next few weekends of rookie school and training were to take place for the dude.  He would travel to the city for the weekend rather than stay during the week.

He did not at the time realize how challenging life would be to maintain his health along with a full time job.  He thought, he would have had a place to park.  He thought, he would have had a place to shower.  He thought, he would have had access to a refrigerator.  He thought, he might at times utilize a kitchen.  He thought, he would have access to a toilet.

Unfortunately for the dude, when he left his grandparents' place the morning of the try-outs for possibly the best job in the world, they told him not to return.  They said lifeguarding wasn’t a real job - despite them for years mentioning the local beaches were struggling to be fully staffed, attempts to goad our dude into a job.

At the try-outs our dude performed well enough for the oldest participant.  He talked with the chief at the starting line of the swim event.  The chief asked if the dude had anything under those shorts because the pockets will act as parachutes causing more drag than necessary.

Our dude admitted to wearing a swim brief that doesn’t fit well and his balls might fall out.

The chief said, “Well, nobody would want to see that, but it’s worth the risk to increase your swim speed.”

Emboldened, our dude dropped his shorts.  In a bit of good fortune, a ladybug landed on our dude at the starting line of the all important five hundred meter (500 m) box swim.  The ladybug reminded him of a past love.  He thought how lucky he was to have such a visitor at such a place at such a time.  

After the tryouts and welcome ceremony, our dude drove back to the town of his grandparents.  He ate out at a local restaurant, waiting until dark.  He drove to park at his grandparents figuring if he was not welcome, they would have locked the gate.

The next morning, his grandfather asked, “What are you doing here?  You shouldn’t be here.”

Our dude didn’t bother responding to a man mostly deaf.  When the dude departed, he locked the gate behind him, vowing never to return. 

Our dude returned to the city for some onboarding paperwork that morning.  After the meeting, the chief requested a moment with the dude.  He mentioned because of the dude’s failed attempt last year and successful attempt this year, he was inspired to send an email encouraging those who did not make the cut to keep working towards their goals. 

Stache

This past summer, on June 1st, our dude accomplished a bucket list goal.  He was desired by a beach patrol after their fitness assessment and interview.  

The previous year, on June 3rd, though desired after the interview, our dude was not physically fit for the job.  An opportunity to redeem his fitness assessment was presented the following day to those desired but still need to prove their fitness.  The assessment is simply to swim five hundred meters (500 m) within ten minutes (10 min).  He watched the other desirables fail their assessment.  In his attempt, he quit after one hundred meters (100 m), exhausted and out of breath, incapable of maintaining a fifty meter per minute ( 50 m/min) pace.

Luckily for him, a proctor of the assessment was also a swim instructor.  Beyond acknowledging the fact our dude had much to develop, he provided primer instruction.  “Take a kickboard, hold it out, practice keeping your head in the water as you take strokes, work up from one stroke per breath.” 

Our dude had a lot of progress to make if he were to ever become an ocean lifeguard.  Initially, he was twenty percent (20%) of the way there.  So, on June 6th, 2023 our dude began his self-imposed training.  By early December, he was close to his goal.  Being so close, he found a beach to provide a fitness assessment.  His time was ten minutes forty-five seconds (10:45 min:sec), ninety-three percent (93%) of the way.

Then, in late January 2024, our dude successfully passed the fitness assessment!  He swam the distance in nine minutes six seconds (09:06 min:sec) with a negative-split.  The interview with the safest beaches in Florida was a disappointment compared to the one with America’s Greatest Family Resort so, desirability did not arise.

Summer would come again for New Jersey and our dude maintained his fitness throughout the winter and spring.  Part of his draw to this particular beach in New Jersey was due to an offer his grandfather had long and often offered.  “Room and some board for one-hundred dollars ($100) if you have a full-time job; if you do not have a full-time job, room and some board is one-thousand dollars ($1,000).”

Our dude’s foot was in the door for a full-time job.  Training and rookie school would take place over the next few weekends.

From those who tried-out that day this June, our dude earned another moniker:

“Stache.”

My Nig ‘Lil

Yung Versatile spits a good game.

We chill through open mics.

Steadily making a face, sound and vibe.

chillin’

We come for the venue.

We come for the people.

We come for each other.

chillin’

Life isn’t always easy.

Certainly true for our circumstances.

I return the friendship.